


Blood in the Water

by nostalgicatsea



Category: Marvel 616
Genre: Angst, Betrayal, Fanmix, Heartbreak, Loss of Trust, M/M, Post-Break Up, Reconciliation, Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-13 15:52:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17490872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nostalgicatsea/pseuds/nostalgicatsea
Summary: Fanmix for "Plunge" by Kiyaar, one of the most beautiful and tragic fics in the Steve/Tony fandom.He wonders what’s worse, the fact that Steve actually thought he was better than this or the fact that Steve made him believe it for a bit, there, too.The song order follows the plot, and the playlist covers Steve and Tony’s POV throughout the story, individually and then both of their POV at the same time before ending with Steve's.





	Blood in the Water

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kiyaar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiyaar/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Plunge](https://archiveofourown.org/works/830761) by [Kiyaar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiyaar/pseuds/Kiyaar). 



* * *

Here are my notes and some lyrics I pulled from each song. It was a bit difficult choosing which lyrics to quote for some of them because there were a lot of lines that fit the story really well, but hopefully this gives you a good taste for what each song is about.

**Listen:[Spotify](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3WPp1xiqQVAylEWnrKbB5P?si=LheDk8tKQe-r4hQN6jUnqg) | [Youtube](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bR1d8l92Q8Q&list=PLmKB8frecmzk0yQ5frUD0qgYhc7bgOMqi)**

 

 **1\. Fallingwater - Maggie Rogers**  
  
Tony laments that he hasn't loved Steve the way Steve deserves to be loved and thinks about everything terrible he has done and will do to stop the incursions.  
  
_I never loved you fully in the way I could/I fought the current running just the way you would/And now I'm in the creek/And it's getting harder/I'm like falling water_  
  
_Go on and tell me just what I'm supposed to say/As if it could be any other way/Oh, it's getting louder/Go on and tell me just how I could allow/All that's light to end up somehow/Where it's getting darker_

 

 **2\. Blood // Water - grandson**  
  
Steve finds out about the mindwipe and lashes out with explosive fury.  
  
_Beg me for mercy/Admit you were toxic/_ _You poisoned me just for another dollar in your pocket/_ _Now I am the violence/_ _I am the sickness/_ _Won't accept your silence/_ _Beg me for forgiveness_

 

 **3\. Natural - Imagine Dragons**  
  
Steve disapproves of the Illuminati's—and by extension, Tony's—solutions and refuses to resort to them. He condescendingly and sarcastically applauds Tony's arrogance and his natural ability to do what he believes is necessary to save the world, regardless of how moral the solution is.  
  
_Will you hold the line?/When every one of them is giving up or giving in, tell me/In this house of mine?/Nothing ever comes without a consequence or cost, tell me/Will the stars align?/Will heaven step in? Will it save us from our sin? Will it?/'Cause this house of mine stands strong_  
  
_You're a natural/A beating heart of stone/You gotta be so cold/To make it in this world/Yeah, you're a natural/Living your life cutthroat_

 

 **4\. I Feel Like I'm Drowning - Two Feet**  
  
Steve tells himself Tony will never change and he's done with him, but he can't stop being angry and can't stop hurting from Tony's betrayal.  
  
_You keep dreaming and dark scheming/Yeah, you do/You're a poison and I know that is the truth_  
  
_I feel like I'm drowning/I'm drowning/You're holding me down and/Holding me down/You're killing me slow/So slow, oh no_

 

 **5\. Bruises** **\- Lewis Capaldi**  
  
Tony misses Steve. He wants to keep all of his bruises, the tender ones Steve placed on him when they were together and even the ones he left on him with his callous words after their break-up; he'd rather have Steve angry but still with him than Steve cutting him out of his life. He needs Steve as things get more hopeless with the incursions because he loves him and has always been better with him at his side.  
  
_But I hope I never lose the bruises that you left behind/Oh my lord, oh my lord, I need you by my side_  
  
_There must be something in the water/'Cause everyday it's getting colder/And if only I could hold you/You'd keep my head from going under_

 

 **6\. I'll Be Good - Jaymes Young**  
  
Tony would do anything to make it up to Steve and to save the world. He's done so much wrong. They're running out of options and he's terrified and full of self-loathing.  
  
_I'll be good, I'll be good/For all of the times that I never could_  
  
_My past has tasted bitter/For years now/So I wield an iron fist/Grace is just weakness/Or so I've been told/I've been cold, I've been merciless/But the blood on my hands scares me to death_

 

 **7\. I Never Learn - Lykke Li**  
  
He repeats his mistakes over and over again. He hurts Steve over and over again. But he's been touched by Steve's love, and he will always stay true to him. It doesn't matter how he dies. He'll die to save Steve. He'll die for love.  
  
_I'm right here, I'm your star-crossed lover/I lie here like a starless lover/I'll die here as your phantom lover/I never learn/I never learn_

 

 **8\. November - Max Richter**  
  
Tony sees Steve's list of last resorts and panics. He can't let Steve do any of those things. Steve shouldn't have blood on his hands, but his hands...his hands are stained aplenty. He makes a deal with the devil. Everything goes sideways and he loses control of the situation quickly.

 

 **9\. Only the Winds - Ólafur Arnalds**  
  
Steve finds Tony, lost in his visions of other worlds, of other versions of Steve and himself who loved each other more than anything. Tony asks Steve to help him, and sorrow and heartache and love all swell in him as he comes to terms with what he sees and what he knows he has to do; he goes under their tide.

 

 **10\. Daydreaming - Radiohead**  
  
Tony wants Steve to know how much he loves him, but Steve knows. He knows. He's gathered up in Steve's arms, in Steve's heart, and they melt into each other, their souls bleeding and mixing together, becoming one. Everything falls away until this is all that remains and all Tony knows.  
  
_This goes/Beyond me/Beyond you/The white room/By a window/Where the sun comes/Through_

 

 **11\. Saturn - Sleeping At Last**  
  
In the last moments, in that place that belonged to just the two of them, somewhere beyond this world and beyond this life, Steve learns everything. It is Tony's last and most beautiful gift.  
  
_You taught me the courage of stars before you left/How light carries on endlessly, even after death/With shortness of breath, you explained the infinite/How rare and beautiful it is to even exist_


End file.
